The Playlist: Pick-Up Artist Memoir 'The Game' Headed To The Big Screen

The Playlist: Pick-Up Artist Memoir 'The Game' Headed To The Big Screen

Lads Night Out Rules

LADS NIGHT OUT! DONT BE THE FOOL AGAIN!!





Ok, so your out with the lads for a night out and you have a few goals for the night.

Primary Aim 

To have a great time with the lads - barrel of laughs, alcohol and lots of skirt to look at.

Ultimate Goal 

To get your end away by the end of the night with a pretty lady, BOOM!

All to often, you end up with a couple of numbers, maybe a cheeky snog, but inevitably end up rocking to Babestation alone thinking what could have been before crashing unconscious - FAILURE!!

Now lets run through the night to see where you have gone wrong...

Early evening your with the lads having a couple cans in the flat. Plenty of banter flowing. All freshened up and charged to hit the bars and have an awesome night. Around 9pm you start off drinking at the local pub. WRONG MOVE ARSEHOLES! GET TO THE "TART" BARS IN TOWN EARLY. Although it may seem early you do not realise the fanny clock is already ticking...

9 -10.30pm plenty of fit girls, looking their best in the bars eagerly awaiting for a confident, sociable bunch of "nice" cheeky guys to have a laugh with. The ratio of girls to guys between 9 - 11pm is usually above 2:1 (depending on where you go), probably the highest it is going to get all night. So its best to pluck up the courage and "move in" early.

10.30 - 11pm:Finally you end up in the tart bars and your a little tipsy. Its your round and your stood next to a nice set of girls at the bar. Maybe one or even two are checking you out... DO NOT PANIC! A GIRL CAN SENSE A PUSSY A MILE OFF. ACT CONFIDENT (ESPECIALLY WITH YOUR BODY LANGUAGE), KEEP EYE CONTACT AND MAYBE SMILE IF YOUR FEELING CONFIDENT). Now you have got her interest, it would be a good point to start a conversation. DONT USE SHITTY CHAT -UP LINES! ITS ALWAY GOOD TO START BY ASKING A WOMANS OPINION ON SOMETHING...So now its your turn at the bar, I would highly recommend you do not fall into the trap of buying her/her mates a drink! Although it may seem to work at times, more than often it will leave you out the pocket and at a dead end :( Once you have been served at the bar, tell the girls your off back to your mates and that they should come join you if they are feeling brave.

 NOTE:- the best place to get the banter flowing with the girls is the smoking area, so always have a pack handy. You always have the opener of asking for a lighter if stuck. Or more often then not, there will be a none-smoker girl who wants a cig. At least it allows for you to start a conversation without coming across sleazy. The ball is in your court when they come to you asking for something..

Anyway, there are many fit birds in the tart bars but you decide to play it cool, carry on the banter with your mates thinking the night is still young...NO DICKHEAD! GET A NUMBER, FACEBOOK AND EVEN A CHEEKY SNOG IF YOU CAN. MOVE QUICK, OR ITS GOING TO END UP IN DISAPPOINTMENT...

 12am: You move on to a club. The ratio is about even now  - 1:1, still good odds as there are plenty of fit girls around. You decide to sit down with the lads and drink a few more before you hit the dancefloor around 1am. You think there is plenty of time still as the club doesnt shut until 3am. SLAP YOURSELF !! Like i said the fanny clock is ticking. The slags usually get hit on early and are out before 1.30am! Also, most girls do not have the stamina, need to have sex as guys do and end up leaving early! You have until 1.30 - 1.45am before you begin to notice a sharp decrease in the women and end up having a much higher ratio of guys to girls. You rush into the toilet, seeking the Freshen Up Man who you have been tactically avoiding most the night.

CLICK TO FRESHEN UP FOR THE PUNANI!

  2am: your drunk, and there are 2 guys to 1 girl at best. 1 of your mates has got lucky, so there is more pressure to get some! You go into militant mode, chatting/ dancing next to any girl you can find. However, what you will notice is that even the fat girls are becoming fussy and are turning good looking guys down - NIGHTMARE!

Eventually, you stroll into a kebab shop not being able to string a sentence together before you attempt to talk to the remaining pretty girl before you realise that she has her partner next to her. TAXI!!

SO THE MORAL OF THE STORY - MOVE IN EARLY!!!!